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- Shmoob News Issue #6
Shmoob News Issue #6
Weekly newsletter every Friday... or Saturday...

BREAKING: Is Big Birthday Corp. out of control?
For the past 7 years Big Birthday Corp. has been the sole reason for the ongoing wax crisis in Shmooblesworld, as they are the leading worldwide producer and user of wax. Last Friday they announced they would no longer be producing wax products aside from candles.
The public is outraged by the lack of other wax products and consumers are threatening to stop supporting the business altogether. While most expected Big Birthday Corp. to retract their statement they have been firm with their words and haven't backed down. The old wax products that Big Birthday Corp. used to produce are flying off of shelves and becoming hard to find for Smoobles running low on them.
Consumers are becoming worried that Big Birthday Corp. will follow through with their plans and this global wax crisis will become far worse than previously thought. While the future is unsteady, the public can only hope that this is only a marketing stunt. More updates to come.
Recently Spotted: The Pinkler?
This Sunday, an unknown Shmooble was spotted being taken into SCT custody. Their appearance was shockingly similar to that of The Purpler, however they appeared to be Pink instead.
There has been a lot of speculation over the origins of the hue shifted imposter, the reigning theory is that they are a lost relative of The Purpler.
There are more fringe theories, some believe it to be an alien trying to mimic The Purpler, some believe The Purpler got a new look.
By far, the most fringe theory has to be the belief that it is The Purpler from an Alternate Universe. Some dubious eye witness accounts purport that a strange otherworldly doorway opened, and The Pinkler came right through like they had business to do.
As of right now it is unclear the motives of this strange Pinkler, or what the SCT has planned for them.
Devious Master caught with millions after alleged Crypto Scam
In January of this year, the cryptocurrency “Shmoon Coin” had gone under fire after Shmoobles lost thousands from their wallets. While Devious Master, the creator of this digital currency, released a statement saying that this issue would be resolved the truth revealed much worse.
Devious Master’s Crypto Wallet history has shown a massive dump, supporting the theory that the lost assets were, in fact, a rug pull. Devious Master has refused to comment on this, choosing to instead post that “The haters can’t touch me” on his socials. The SCT has an ongoing investigation, and many believe this audit will plunge Devious Master’s crypto fortune into financial ruin.
Authors: Supierb & CarouselCakes
Editors: mfof